Monday, December 12, 2011

frustrated...

I am learning quickly that the journey to hell and back with dysplastic hips is super slow. I am actually quite lucky that I have not gone years without a doctor not listening to me, or a giving me a proper diagnosis. I am thankful for that. I have read the stories of many wonderful women than spent YEARS in pain before getting anywhere.

At the same time... I am angry. I am angry that I have already gone the five months in pain. I am angry that I have a hard enough time getting through the day, let alone work out. I am angry that is still hurts. I am most angry at this point because I feel I am inadequately managing my pain. My new doctor decidedly gave me sleeping pills. Granted, I need sleep. My previous post talked about being tired and heaven knows, I am. But I am tired because I am in pain. I do not sleep for more than an hour or so at a time. I did have a small prescription of pain killers that I hoarded, strictly, for evening use. On good nights this allowed for a partial nights sleep. I have run out.

I know I have a crappy pain tolerance. I am aware of this about myself. OTC meds do very little at this point and I know this is partly my fault because I use them often but... I don't like to hurt.

I take hot baths. I try ice. I try heat. I elevate. These things offer some comfort with use but they do not offer relief.

I did 8 weeks of physical therapy which DID NOT offer comfort. It added more pain.

I am contemplating cortisone shots but I am hearing such mixed reviews... I don't know what to do.

I called Dr. Mayo's office today and they still do not have my file. Which would have been requested to send to them two weeks ago tomorrow. It took a week for my copy to be ready... so maybe that is right...

I want to just scream but what good would that do?

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